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New York, NY, Escape To Margaritaville She says, Surely you must have noticed? But that was the thing. Im totally psyched. What does a girl have to do these days? The point is Im messed up. He called me by my name. Backstage is the top resource for acting monologues content and jobs that will help you land your dream opportunity . Sorry! But I cant help it. I mean how hard is it to have one kid asleep at night in your house how hard is it but no . A nice manly slap on the back. Fine. Its a wonderful age. Its hard to imagine the Grim Reaper with a shuttlecock. He tells her he cant help himself. Thats how it is with women. Cornelius Hackl: Because I'm gonna light some candles under them. I think you have to marry me. Watch instead for the musical numbers and the lavish costumes. I can lie here for hours thinking about him. Through Dolly's subtle machinations, several unlikely couples come together to find happiness in 19th-century New York. Thats a pretty over-the-top version. I asked her if he made her wash the bits he cant reach. There are some who would be grateful for that--the plot is but a flimsy excuse to string together song and dance numbers. Shes really crying hard now, and she goes back into the bedroom. Horace: Eighty percent of the people in the world are fools and the rest of us are in danger of contamination. The reality is, angel, you are no longer the only girl in Nick Parkers life. Malaria fever and jonquils and then this boy. Sullivan, ticket seller: Gonna marry him yourself, Dolly? Educational Study Guide Theatre Under The Stars Houston, Texas Written by Shay Thornton x--Table of Contents-- Hello, Dolly! Since Im being judged by a jury of my peers I will attempt to insert like and totally into my confession as much as possible. Not enough to live with. But I should tell you right off the bat this is not going anywhere. I dont believe in them. Other important songs include: Put On Your Sunday Clothes, Ribbons Down My Back and Before the Parade Passes By. They say too that she will rather die than give any sign of affection. I will also end statements with a question mark? (Feverishly) This is the dress in which I led the cotillion, won the cakewalk twice at Sunset Hill, wore one spring to the Governors ball in Jackson ! (She wears a girlish frock of yellowed voile with a blue silk sash. But the problem is.despite every fact I can muster, theres something that still doesnt check out. I mean, you know, despite the fact that Im in a fat suit that I cant take off and despite the fact that everyones making fun of me behind my back and despite the fact that your little girlfriend gave me the stink eye in class yesterday. There are only a few things in life that are guaranteed to be glorious and memorable and sparkling with gowns and cummerbunds. You could lie there thinking well, at least Im not dead! I butter the mans toast, Elisa. They say the lady is fair tis a truth, I can bear them witness. And it may be the only chance Ill ever have to dance with a boy. Okay? . All right, Ill hold them myself And then I (She stops in front of the picture.) The musician. Where Hello, Dolly! Possess your soul in patience you will see! In a minute someones going to bang on the lid and tell me to come out. And, all right, I know the Americans go on with all this flag-waving, patriotic bullshit and think the rest of the world hates them, but fuck, Talbot, theyre right: the rest of the world does hate em I hate em, and I want to live here! The one dark secret that will absolutely be the wedge that keeps us apart. And maybe I can deal with your black soul better when Im older, but right now I cant handle it. (beat) Some very bad guys strapped a bomb to my chest and they are forcing me to commit a crime. Regina George: Back, through, around, behind. Im weak. Im fine now. (beat) No thank-yous no yum-yums not a peep, tho Man is silent as the grave. Were twins, arent we? I had malaria fever all that spring. Tom: You would be amazed, a lot of shopping malls. After I base my entire concept of self-esteem on the fact that youre willing to marry me! I mean, you hate everything. I told you Im brilliant. SO, I PUT MY HAND IN THERE. Im with you now, but Im thinking about him, and thats not fair to either of us. Just give me five minutes of your time, Mr. Hackl, and I'll have you dancing in the streets. Stop seeing each other or going out or anything like that. Five of them, running around the backyard like mobile bonfires. Maybe you feel for me the way you feel for a good friend, or if the world f hates me a brother. Its envy, isnt it? Are you honestly and truly taking Katrina to the dance? Excuse Me Of course WA AHHH Minnie hold your tongue There's a man in there ! All that being said, Hello, Dolly!, is one of the most famous songs in all of musical theater. Hello. But thats not the worst bit, Stephen. Your parents. Vocal range: alto-soprano. He said I had better resolve it, stop treating her like I was still a child. First performed on Broadway in 1964, it enjoyed a nearly 3000 show first run, was awarded 10 Tonys, and has seen numerous revivals both on and off Broadway. . I said Im gonna go hump the fridge. 2 So I start tellin her about my mole and cancer and all this and she starts feelin me like she had plastic gloves on and I was lyin on this bed, like a baby almost . No, the world must be peopled. New York, NY, Accessibility Statement Terms Privacy |StageAgent 2020. Why? Yknow, about authentic love. I might pumice my feet. Dolly Levi: Money, pardon the expression, is like manure. Im gonna go for a 560, convertible, in gold, with leather interior, all the options. He was a political prisoner in Argentina. I put it to you, Camp Firewood, as we spend the last dinner together: Be proud of who you are. People come that like, didnt R.S.V.P.! What Im sure of is this- we need to stop. It wasnt my fault, was it? So, O.K., like the Haitians need to come to America but some people are all, What about the sprain on our resources? And its like, when I had this garden party for my fathers birthday and its all catered, you know, I said R.S.V.P. because its a sit down dinner. Youre probably as yourselves, Isnt he a wierdo, outcast, loose cannon? Maybe. Pat, pat. He lightly pats his belly, like hes a little bear. In this lesson, we will examine this peculiarly successful musical. All rights reserved. Benedick: Act 2 Scene 3 My mum was always saying bring Corey with you on the weekend and shed go all flushed and wear low-cut tops in the kitchen. Warren: They get enough practice thats for sure. Dead? Another 1 win & 13 nominations. If you marry me, your parents will be ecstatic, and you will have lost a lifelong battle of defiance against them. I mean, I couldnt have a lesbian there. And he cant take that off at night. Isnt that silly. You foolish shepherd, wherefore do you follow her, That can entame my spirits to your worship. New York, NY, Escape To Margaritaville If requested, here are a few audition monologues for Hello, Dolly! By the time I reached Year Eight I had fifteen pairs of jeans. Discover our acting monologues to prepare for your auditions. Not everyone wants art that actually HURTS! Isnt that the most pathetic thing youve ever heard? I have for a very long time. Your bugle eyeballs, nor your cheek of cream, I figured Id wait a couple of hours till the cats were dead and mum was feeling a bit sorry for herself and Id knock on the front door and say to her Hi, mum, Ive come to talk about our unresolved conflicts but, oh, no, one of those cats ran into the house. Left the shop. Invitations poured in parties all over the Delta! Like, totally. The story itself is based on the 1955 play The Matchmaker by. (totally in control) Monday morning, youre history. And if its to do with letting the house then youll have to ring the house-agents, because theyre the agents for the house. Look, I gotta say I wasnt like this at boarding school, I didnt like getting smashed on rocket fuel and talking about vaginas, honestly I had no interest in Alcohol at all. Eaten. I get a car right away. When it was time for her to leave, he asked if he could look at her face for a while so that he would have something beautiful to remember in the long months ahead. JEFFREY abruptly switches from rage to good humor, adopting a supercilious smile and a patronizing tone. Gain full access to show guides, character breakdowns, auditions, monologues and more! Heres my theory on that. Like, if I blew her off to hang out with Kyle she would be like, Why didnt you call me back! And then I worry about whether he can tell my hearts going crazy, and I have to act really cool. This was not easy going up and down the halls with. You have come to the right page. . Youre starting to feel like a woman and believe it or not soon youll understand what its like to be in love. She decided to walk into a busy cycle lane wanting to get tangled in a bike. I mean: not fine fine everythings. No, Im not in Spain, dear. I think you are an amazing woman, I honestly do. When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married. So theyre out there somewhere helping themselves. petrol and put a match to them. Or I might go to church. So I stood there in the shop, and there were loads of congratulations cards new babies, pink and blue, storks with bundles, balloons, all spewing out. Its totally weird, like, taking all your clothes off and having sex with someone you barely know, and then being like Whats up now? You know? But- I guess I do care what my peers think about me. Horace: Advice is cheap Ms. Molloy. The New York Daily News wrote: 'I wouldn't say that Jerry Herman's score is memorable.' If elected I promise that I will pray more often. is that, beyond the title song, there aren't any other truly standout songs. 1 May 2023. Who should get into the lift with me on floor number seven? It makes me laugh. Soul mates? Far more interesting than all those silly girls at school. And its not like me. Cos I got bored and had sex with you? Glittering stage numbers showcase a commanding Barbra Streisand as Dolly Levy, a New York matchmaker who can find a mate for anyone. Thats where were at now, and now some pricks actually done something about it, and killed three thousand people, and the Americans are fucking mad as hell, because they know every single one of them is on that plane hurtling towards the Twin Towers and they dont like it and theyre not going to stand for it, and theyre going to get the pricks thatre threatening them. You were nothing before you met me! Transfer to Washington. So that ruined the mood. Enrolling in a course lets you earn progress by passing quizzes and exams. Im a fact checker for Christs sake. Its on the hallway carpet. I do know that I am, and I cant overcome it, I mean. Her boyfriend was the whale in the corner, blocking the door to the toilets. Like I didnt know until that moment just how much I wanted to be a father. All other trademarks and copyrights are the property of their respective owners. Its a rite of passage as sacred as getting your drivers license or buying your first bra. I want to be better to do good and better things and to make a proper sort of decision here, but I I cant. - Definition, Artists & Instruments, What Is Rumba? They just don't make musicals like this any more. l realize that it was Your divine hand that disqualified Tammy, and now Im asking that You go that one last mile and make sure to put me in office where I belong, so that I may carry out Your will on Earth as it is in Heaven. I have some flat shoes in my bag and anyway, hes fat. Even though I was pretty excited about what happened last night, and also about like, maybe like, the prospect of like, I dont know, like going out with you Which I would be very into, if you were. Martin, I said. But how was I to know? Is that clear? Matchmaker Dolly Levi is a widow, a matchmaker, and also a professional meddler --but everything changes when she decides that the next match she needs to make is to find someone for herself. How came her eyes so bright? Do it! But I dont say that. Dance ability: some. Beatrix: Your mum must be pretty stoked that youre not taking me. is one of those musicals that keeps appearing in Broadway revivals, community theaters, and high schools everywhere. They want you to slay a dragon for them one second, then cry at a guide dog commercial the next. I see no blood, no wound. And so if the government could just get to the kitchen and re-arrange some things we could certainly party with Haitians. But that other stuff I gotta tell you up front Im just not ready, Alison. Copyright 1964 by Jerry Herman: Im in a great mood. Dolly Levi: And on those cold winter nights, Horace, you can snuggle up to your cash register. Which you might learn if you ever actually left your goddamn hermetically sealed submarine here with all the windows closed and no natural light BECAUSE NATURAL LIGHT ISNT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU! Are you mad? It used to seriously piss me off. Im all walking like Ive got a paintbrush up my arse, thinking: Tis not your inky brows, your black silk hair, If it wasnt for that damn cat, I wouldnt be here. Stop! The composer. This crush its like a disease. Your head! Mother said, Honey, theres no more room for jonquils. And still I kept on bringing in more jonquils. Im referring to myself when I say Megan, its me Megan. Young women need the Prom. And the phlegm just slid away. She slapped me. James: Um. I thought, I dunno, I thought maybe they were so close together they felt like one, or maybe when one was down there, the other was off doing somethin else like I dunno, I just never thought about it. features such memorable songs as Before the Parade Passes By, It Only Takes a Moment, Put on Your Sunday Clothes, and - of course - the title number, Hello, Dolly! Dolly herself is one of the strongest and richest starring roles for a woman ever written for the musical theatre, and famous Dolly Levis have included Carol Channing, Ethel Merman, Pearl Bailey, Mary Martin, Barbra Streisand, and most recently, Bette Midler and Bernadette Peters. A monologue will soar if you connect with it! People used to throw firecrackers on my head in high school. She doesnt say a word about it. Stuffed in a box like that, I mean youd be in there for ever. Book by MICHAEL STEWART Music and Lyrics by JERRY HERMAN Based on the play THE MATCHMAKER by Thornton Wilder Original Production Directed and Choreographed by Gower Champion Produced for the Broadway Stage by David Merrick and Champion-Five, Inc. TAMS-WITMARK MUSIC LIBRARY, INC. (Banging on the floor with his fists. Its me. Gain full access to show guides, character breakdowns, auditions, monologues and more. Hello, Dolly! Throw yourself off the roof! This Book have some digitalformats such us : kindle, epub, ebook, paperbook, and another formats. - Definition, Origin & History, Woodstock: History, Facts, Performers & Bands, Jesus Christ Superstar: Summary & Characters, Electronic Music: History, Types & Artists, Art, Music, and Architecture Around the World, Introduction to Textiles & the Textile Industry, World Music & Art Lesson Plans & Activities, NES Music - WEST (504): Practice & Study Guide, Library Science 101: Information Literacy, Pope Gregory II: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory VII: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory VIII: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory XII: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory XIII: Accomplishments & Legacy, Pope Gregory XV: Biography & Accomplishments, Pope Gregory XVI: Biography & Accomplishments, Bishop Oscar Romero: Biography, Assassination & Quotes, Blessed James Alberione: Biography, Death & Quotes, Pope John XXIII: Biography, Facts & Quotes, Pope John XXIII: Canonization, Contributions & Miracles, Archbishop Aloysius Stepinac: Biography & Quotes, Working Scholars Bringing Tuition-Free College to the Community. Sister Winnie: Chris has taught music and has a master's degree in music education. I dont really get what youre upset about. You know what Im saying?? Dolly Levi: Money, pardon the expression, is like manure. ? And I would be, like, Why are you so obsessed with me? So then my birthday was an all-girls pool party and I was like, I cant invite you, Janis, because I think youre a lesbian. You are a thousand times a properer man And I dont know about you, but I hate doctors. Im gonna give you the short version of an incredibly complicated and f up situation, so please be cool. Im crazy. I searched high and low through that kitchen. I find actors always have great dramatic pieces on their casting profiles, or at auditions, but rarely have a great comic monologue. Create an account to start this course today. (as if this is shocking) I was best friends with her in middle school. If you really loved me you wouldnt need to ask. Love me? For the next three years, they were allowed to see each other only once a year for two hours. I have to figure out what Im doing. Do you see where Im going with this? Nice shoes faggot you got mousse in your hair lets put mousse in his anus! Id be flipping through MAD magazine and just put the thing down and take it. You know the problem with pyromania? Let's talk about the main character, Dolly Levi (played by Carol Channing in the first run). 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Cohan: Biography, Music & Songs, Hair the Musical: Synopsis, Songs & Characters, Hard Rock Music: History, Artists & Bands, Hello, Dolly! I hid in the shrubs when Mum came outside to see what was happening. Its no good you going on. And for your information, I adore your father. But what I hope is that you dont really know how you feel for me, and that maybe when you figure it out youll realize its the same way I feel for you. I feel like its a lifeline. Proud of what hes achieved. Come out of there!. Anyway, I know Im trying to change the subject. Not just who we are- jobs or that kind of thing- but it does play into it as well. The poor man, he was such a clean person when he was alive. I have a brilliant beyond brilliant idea. She closed the curtains after that. I mean, youd never know you were in a box, would you? Dont repeat that. Or wasted? Yeah, check me out, cos its never gonna happen, Chub Chub. Come and join the fun in our online acting class, Copyright 2023 StageMilk | an ARH Media PTY LTD website. Course, that means the chances of you getting caught are greater, especially if youre standing in front of the fire, face full of ecstasy and with a gigantic hard on. I mean, I know its not nice to have a bit of your stomach lining poking out, I get it, I do, but really how much more is there to say? But if farts were flattery, honey he would be Shakespeare. . I worry for a second Im going to make a sex offender out of the poor guy. My own mom. Join StageAgent today and unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. His name for me. We have put together a massive list of comedy monologues for men and women, from theatre, film and TV. Irene Molloy: What's this? Here's what you need to know about Cornelius: he's an incredibly innocent man, he's never been kissed, and he's full of, well, wonder.

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